A few months ago, The Robertsdale Yacht Club, the only land-locked yacht club in lower Alabama, was sent a request for quote to produce six replica 17th century naval cannons by a group in Palacios, Texas. This group, which has no name, had heard of the infamous (nefarious?) RYC whose reputation has spread throughout the nautical community.
Just so you know, being landlocked, the RYC has become hugely popular with boaters who suffer from aquaphobia.
Quickly responding to the RFQ the RYC organized a new division, the Naval Ordinance Division to design, test, and manufacture the replica cannons. The “unnamed group” quickly issued a contract and fabrication commenced.
The cannons will be used on a replica of The La Belle captained by LaSalle in 1685 on a voyage from France to Mississippi. He missed Mississippi and hit Texas. I guess it was close enough. LaSalle set up a colony at present day Palacios. Things did not go well. The La Belle sank in the bay. The crew was somewhat miffed with LaSalle. So much so they killed him. Lesson learned: do not get French sailors miffed. Later, the local population became somewhat miffed with the sailors. So much so they killed the sailors. Lesson learned: don’t miff the locals.
Some years later on Matagorda Bay, allegedly, a local fisherman (reportedly of mixed French and Indian ancestry) had his shrimp net snag on what appeared to be a very old piece of timber. The local fisherman was overheard to say “This appears to be a very old piece of timber.” Actually, divers from R.V. Anomaly of The Texas Historical Commission were sent to the bottom to investigate. Upon surfacing, one diver held what appeared to be a very old piece of timber. He was heard commentating “This appears to be a very old piece of timber” and promptly took the timber to be examined. It turned out to be part of a very old ship, The La Belle.
A coffer dam was built around the ship which was eventually salvaged, preserved, and displayed at a local museum - the ship, not the coffer dam. The original cannons were also found along with human remains. The human remains have been nick-named “Dead Bob.” The La Belle will soon be displayed at an Austin, Texas, museum.
The loss, discovery, salvage, and display detailed in “From a Watery Grave” by James E. Bruseth and Toni S. Turner makes one think Clive Cussler had a hand in it.
The replica Pettit Belle is nearing completion and was launched in early December of 2012. The RYC NOD produced cannons will be aboard. In all likelihood, it will soon be recognized that the cannons are the highlight of the entire construction effort.
Having technically not previously built large bore 17th century naval weapons; we investigated the age old, tried and true methods of fabricating cannons and settled on the traditional materials. We used PVC pipe. Why LaSalle did not use this material for his cannons is still under investigation.
A later requirement from the “unnamed group” was for the cannons to actually fire. Considering that the local law enforcement community would probably take a dim view of us hurling cannon balls around Robertsdale, we decided to make carbide cannons. After developing the necessary tooling, fabrication commenced. The first cannon turned out better than expected. No snickering please. After a fashion, the ignition system performed flawlessly. These cannons are VERY LOUD! Even Dead Bob sat up and said “Dude, those cannons are VERY LOUD!”
As word leaked out that we had developed successful 17th century carbide cannons, other members of the “unnamed group” made inquiries to obtain cannons of their own. We suspect the arming of vessels other than The Pettit Belle. The RYC is not responsible for how the weapons are used. Remember, it’s not the cannons that make the VERY LOUD noises; it’s my partner putting too much carbide in that does it.
This just in: the “unnamed group” does have a name now, it’s The Palacios Area Fund of the Communities Foundation of Texas.
This organization is responsible for the design and construction of the replica, The Pettit Belle. This will make a fine addition to Madagorda Bay and develop an increased awareness and appreciation of the local history and a fitting tribute to Roberta Ripke who inspired the construction of The Pettit Belle.
Casual observers at the RYC have noticed an eerie similarity in the names of Ted Riccio, one of the founding members of the RYC and Ted Riccio, part-time boat builder of Palacios, Texas. This may only be a coincidence, or it could be something we can blow completely out of proportion. We will keep you posted on any further developments.
Word has leaked of the delivery of the six cannons and people from far and wide have flocked to the Palacios area to see and hear the famous cannons of the RYC NOD. Dead Bob, ever the entrepreneur, suggested charging admission. He was over-ruled. Dead Bob has since been enrolled in the Alcoholics Anonymous for the Walking Dead. Sad story, that.
Being the enterprising lot that we are, the RYC has organized a new division to take full advantage of the newly developed naval ordinance. The new division will be known as The Pirates of Robertsdale.
Being the only land-locked yacht club in lower Alabama, we have taken a lot of flak from other yacht clubs that have water. The POR will be chartered to pillage and lay waste to all snooty yacht clubs that have water. The cannons will be mounted on Capt. Dana Hall’s and Capt. Ted Riccio’s ships in preparation to unleash devastating one gun broadsides against said snooty yacht clubs. We would have had more cannons, but the coin-drop on Route 59 did not go well. These ships-of-the-line will be trailered to local yacht clubs with destructive fire being rained down upon the hapless victims.
Destruction will begin promptly at 9 a.m. A lunch break will commence at 11:30 a.m. Lunch will be comprised of cucumber sandwiches and sparkling water with lime. There will be a meet and greet with the swashbuckling captains at 12:30 p.m. The cannonades will recommence at 1 p.m. The daily activities will end at 4 p.m. sharp. However, as time and weather permits, the taking of wenches will take place.
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